See, my sites have been down for almost a week now because of hackers. Not a site. ALL of my sites.
wewillexplore.com
niltomil.com
pictureinfinity.com
pictureinfinitystudios.com
timhuntphotog.com
syracusemodeling.com
mattantonino.com
itsonlysports.com
and about 15 more. All down because of some Nigerian bank scam hacker.
Here's my proposed solution to ID Theft - elect me as President in 2012.
If elected I promise:
1) To NUKE Nigeria and Ghana off the map. We'll redraw what Africa looks like when the smoke clears.
2) To use the Nigerian incident to warn the Middle East the price of ticking us off.
3) We'll find and eliminate Osama Bin Laden - he's a 6'5" muslim with a drip bag attached to him! How hard can this be to find?!
4) I'll hire all the best hackers in the world with $5 million a year salaries to lure them in. Then deport them to the moon...with no wifi. Or air.
5) I'll spend all the money saved on ID Theft, Fraud recovery, time wasted chasing down hackers, hacks, phishing schemes and such as an even distribution to everyone making 250...no 200... no 150k per year! This could be up to a trillion dollars in redistributed wealth!
6) If even a cockroach lives in Nigeria, I'll nuke the entire blasted country again and again.
7) I promise NOT to kiss babies, shake everyone's hand and smile like all is right with the world when 1 in 5 homeowners owe more than their homes are worth.
Anonymous spam will come with a 10 year sentence with no possibility of parole. If it includes the words viagra, erection, gambling, casino, inches, "my friends", or pharmacy that will be bumped to an immediate execution upon conviction.
Can you tell how happy Nigerian scammers make me? And yes, there are scammers in other parts of the world. I figure we can set an example with 30-50 nukes though. Yes, I know not ALL Nigerians are scammers. But how can you separate those 10 from the other 133,529,990?
PS. If you're Nigerian and offended by this message, well, too bad.
